Monday, October 19, 2009

Not Me Novel

I did not do the following things this week nor did I have enough of these moments to fill several weeks of posts!

*Pull over in a parking lot to allow my three year old to pee in an old Chuck E Cheese cup. I always make my children use the bathroom in designated facilities.

*Realize, while driving home from a photo shoot, that I had forgotten to pick up my youngest from the babysitter. I NEVER forget about my children.

*Eat an entire bag of dark chocolate Chex Mix...in one sitting. That stuff is NOT delicious and I am not a piglet!

*Have to rewash two loads of laundry because I forgot to switch them to the dryer...I'm always on top of housework.

*Let my oldest boys go to school two days without having their hair brushed. My children are always perfectly "coiffed" before leaving the house.

*I CERTAINLY did not, TWICE in one day, misplace my car keys, AFTER unlocking the doors and putting O in his car seat. I am not that absent minded and can remember where I put things...especially 5 minutes after I put them there!

*During a yard sale this week, I did not look up to see O, standing, "nakey butt" in the door way with a roll of toilet paper. He did not declare, loudly, "I pooped, come wipe my butt". I also did not have a yard full of people at the time! My kids have perfect manners.

*My son did not come home sick from school on Friday with a fever. Once he was home for a bit and I rechecked his temperature, he did not come back with no fever. The school is always on top of those types of things.

*Upon arrival at my husbands work party this Friday, we did not sit in the van and watch people enter the party. We also did not scope out the dress of the people who were entering. I also did not take off as much of my costume as possible when I saw how few people had dressed up...I am confident enough in myself to rock a Halloween costume regardless of everyone else.

*I did not make my 7 year old stuff his foot into a sock sized for a 3 year old because there were no others clean. We always have clean clothes and plenty of appropriate footwear.

*My poor husband did not get accused of saying a "swear word" during a presentation he did at church on Sunday...his saying "Jack asked me to"...Did not get interpreted Jacka**....poor guy. He did not think it was really funny either. We always have full decorum and are professional.

Just a few of my moments...there are many, many more!

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Silly Sayings

My kids make me laugh...they also make me want to cry, yell, pull my hair out, etc. O has this adoreable little way of saying things, mostly things that are sassy, and it makes Matt and I laugh. At least for now. We are certain that in a few short years, it won't be funny any more. Like when we tell O, please don't walk across the top of the couch - that is pushed up against the windows - because it isn't safe. O's reply: "I cannot fall". Or the conversations that go like this, O, please put your glasses back on...where are you glasses...and his response is: "I did not hide them mommy"....funny and cute now, but I can see into our future and almost hear our sixteen year old son...and somehow it isn't so funny.

What was funny was S today. He was getting dressed for school and I was helping him. He told me he wanted to wear a belt to school. He found a belt, tucked his shirt into his jeans and came to show me his new look. I had to hold back a chuckle at his look...he had tucked his bulky shirt into his slim jeans and looked..well...silly. I of course assured him that he looked handsome. The response I got was unexpected, but horribly funny. He told me: "I know I look handsome, I just looked in the mirror and ALMOST WHISTLED AT MYSELF"!!

S HATES when people laugh at things he says, unless, he is telling a joke, and it took everything Matt and I had to not laugh hysterically!!

And M....M can't stop acting like a Transformer long enough to say much...everything has to do with Transformers. Even getting dressed involves sound effects and songs!

My boys do make me laugh!

Monday, October 5, 2009

Not Me

This week was an interesting week...but today alone had enough NOT ME moments to fill a book - or at least a blog!

Today, I did not, in an attempt to log onto our online banking acount, cause the bank to freeze our account. I know all our passwords and enter them correctly the first time.

Upon realizing that the account was frozen I did not have to hurry and dress to take my kds to school and drop my husband at work so that I could get to the bank as soon as it opened.

I definitely did not raid M's piggy bank to get enough cash to put in the gas tank so I didn't run out of gas before I got to the bank...I always have enough money for essentials.

I certainly did not rush to the bank to find out that my error alone froze the account. I did not laugh and breathe a huge sigh of relief!

I didn't realize that in my haste to get out the door this morning, that I had given S, NIGHT TIME cold medicine before he went to school. I am always prepared and aware of what I'm doing.

I did not call the school right away to tell them that if I HAD given S, that medicine, he could call home if he just seemed too sleepy....the secratary did not laugh at me and assure me that this isn't the first time it's happened!

O, DEFINTELY get bit by my mom and dad's dog.

After, calming O, from the dog bite, he didn't get, I didn't hear M screaming. I went downstairs to find that S, certainly hadn't thrown a rock and hit him in the chin with it. My kids know that we NEVER throw stones.

After cleaning my house up and while making dinner, M and O, didn't come in the house, covered in a wet sandy mess. They did not keep their dirty shoes, socks, pants and shirts on and trapse through my house stomping (or so it seemed) with every step. My sons know the proper way to come into the home and what to do when they are dirty.

Just a few of my not me moments for this week!